“What? You couldn’t lift this?”-- a campus safety officer talking about a tree limb that fell on my car
So we had a huge summer storm yesterday, not unusual for the south, especially not unusual after a sticky, “lung-cloggingly” hot day. The storm lasted about 30 minutes, barricading me in my office, which was fine because I was waiting to give a public reading of one of my stories anyway, so I had to be there. The reading went well. What didn’t go well, however, was the incident with the tree limb in the parking lot of the college. It broke one of my windshield wipers and scratched the paint on the left side of the car, and the bottom of the limb was behind my back tire, as if to say to me, Heck no, I’m not letting you leave, punk!
So I called campus safety, told the man I couldn’t move the limb, and I couldn’t, not easily. This young officer arrived in his little golf-cart like vehicle, pulled up beside me and said, “What? You couldn’t lift this?”
My response: “I wasn’t going to.”
In hindsight, maybe I should have said to him what I said to those teenage babbling brooks from an earlier blog entry: “Seriously!”
Or, said this: “What part of ‘I can’t lift this tree limb’ didn’t you understand?”
I know what you’re thinking, “Now, Ms. First Line, that would not have been a nice thing to say to a person who was trying to help you.”
That’s why I didn’t say it.
But I gave him a scowl, and watched him throw the limb aside then survey my vehicle with little care. Today I was told the incident was considered to be an Act of God, meaning the college is not liable for the damages. How convenient. The entire situation could have been much worse, but I sure hope it doesn’t rain again before I get this problem fixed. If it does, one family member has advised me to put an arm out the window and wipe down the windshield as often as I can while driving down the road. This is not funny, but I can hear you chuckling at the thought of a person actually doing this.
Stop laughing.
Okay, what part of that command didn’t you understand?
About Me
- Ms. First Line
- First lines. You find them everywhere: in fiction, nonfiction, poetry, movies, plays, songs, in the voices of people you know well, and those you don’t. In this blog, you’ll find a compilation of captivating lines, sentences, random thoughts, and quotes from every part of life. Some of these lines will lead to other observations, which I’ll elaborate on through small, eruptive tantrums or tangled, poetic musings; it all depends on what I read, what I imagine, what I hear, what comes to life. So be careful what you say out there, distant followers. You never know. I could be listening to you.